I have a small mouth. Every dentist and orthodontist I've been too has made it a priority to let me know this. Apparently it affects the rate at which my baby teeth fall out. Essentially, my teeth took a lot longer to come out than a normal person's teeth (it probably didn't help that I was too stubborn to actually pull my own teeth. I knew they would come out when they good and ready.). Naturally, the dentist couldn't stand that my teeth were taking so long to fall out, so he continually encouraged my parents to have him pull them for me. As a result, I ended up having almost 20 baby teeth yanked before their time by the dentist (as a side note, I've also had several adult teeth extracted, not including my wisdom teeth which have been removed as well).
Now, all of that was a prologue to the real story. Because I'd like to tell you about the first tooth that I ever lost. It was not a natural loss. I was but a young lad of 7, when that first tooth did fly free from my mouth. I had known that it was loose, but, again, my mind had already decided that teeth came out on their own, so I didn't need to worry about it. It happened one evening as my family prepared to take an excursion to the grand retail store known only as...Walmart. As we were walking from the house to the car, my brother and I started a conversation about how much money we had in our wallets. I was excited to actually have cash. I boldly informed my brother that I was going to count my money once we arrived at the store. It was at this time that I noticed a gross insult to my boyhood! My shoe had come untied. Being the know-it-all child that I was, I quickly stooped to rectify the problem. Of course, it takes two hands to tie your shoe. I had previously pulled my pocketbook from my pocket to show my brother. Needing the hand that was holding my wallet, I placed the wallet firmly between my teeth, while I expertly tied my shoe. At this point, my brother approached me, telling me that if I counted my money in the store, someone would steal my wallet from me. To demonstrate what would happen to me, and not realizing that my wallet was, in fact, in my mouth, my brother closed his hand on my wallet and gave a sharp tug. I cried out in pain as, much to my dismay, my loose tooth decided to hitch a ride with my wallet.
Thus ends the tale of that infamous day.
~The Piebald Penguin
1 comment:
I remember this one, although what I remember was the screaming afterwards and Daniel's repeated insistence that "it was an accident!" :) So glad you lost your teeth, though. It would sure stink to be a grownup with little tiny baby teeth.
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